Treacherous.

This is for real, and it's in my college. It is the spiral staircase leading to the ground floor, and its door is at the back of my usual lecture hall. I started going on here whenever I wanted to sneak out of class. It's really scay, because it's literally vertical,and the steps are so tiny. If you've read my previous posts, you'll know I'm terrified of heights, so at first I tried backing out, but my friend was behind me and she wouldn't let me go the normal way. So I clung onto the banister and took my wobbly legs downstairs. Needless to say, I survived.

Today was Sunday. I really love Sundays, there's something different about that day, I can feel it within me. Today started great. I woke up at 11:30am, which is quite early for me, and I went online, had breakfast, the usual. The night before, I attended the welcome party of my college, where the 2nd years welcomed the 1st years (us). It was fun, loads more fun than I expected, and when the night was over I felt a nagging pain in my throat, and I knew something would hurt in the morning. I woke up with a sore throat, and me barely being able to talk. The reason was because of hooting and screaming from last night, and drinking really cold Sprite. Lol. It's better now, ever since I had a Tylenol, but my eyes are red and burning and watery too, so I see a flu coming on :(

My substage was yesterday morning, my last one. It. sucked. Worse than any other. I was so tired, and I couldn't ID the leg properly, and I was confusing things, and the doctor actually told me she would fail me, so I went to the lecture hall, begrudgingly. When I came downstairs a while later, I found out she passed me- but barely. 50 out of 100. So what, I passed! That meant alot, it meant that I had passed every single substage of the lower limb...now comes the stage, on the 14th. which is the ENTIRE lower limb. :S that is scary to know, that you have to learn every little thing all together. I'm supposed to study today, and I did begin to, but I just couldn't do it, my heart is not into it. My mom told me to start tomorrow, when I have a proper routine and schedule, when I sleep properly. I guess she's right. 

I went to go see my sister today,Kt. She's in residence, and she will be till the 18th. I do miss her, the house kinda came together with her. It was fun, my parents and me went to go see her, she didn't cry (as many other girls did) but she didn't fail to emphasize how much she wanted to come home and how much she was hating it there. Her cellphone has been confiscated, she has no access to the internet- it's basically like living in a prison. 

Things are very strange at home. Even though I should not discuss it because this is a public blog, but it's bearing me down to such an extent that I think I should mention it, if not explain. We are going through sever household stress. My dad is a businessman, a contractor for houses, and like in every business, sometimes there are highs, and some lows. Right now, we are at a low. We are really tight on money, and it scares me because we have so many things to get done that involves money. My mom needs to have an operation on her foot, and she can't walk a lot either, or the infection will increase. So she only gets up to make food, and we've been living on store bought roti for 2 weeks. Normally, Khadija would take care of the house, but, she's in residence. It's really affecting me especially, because I need my house to be in a balance for myself to be in a balance. I need a million things, like new headphones, and a haircut, but I have no money. And I hate the way it feels, it's a really sucky feeling.

H has to go back to the US this year. I can't even tell you how much I'll miss him. t's like, the moment that thought comes in my head, my heart drops to my stomach. He's going for so long, for 6 months. He told me he didn't want to go, he would miss his family, Pakistan, me. I don't want him to go either. But it's something that has to be done, to get his official blue passport. I don't want to think about it much, because it'll make me sad.

Tomorrow is the start of a new week,and it's going to be odd day. Since my sister snatched most of my clothes, I'm thinking of just wearing a lot of jewelry. That's odd enough. Lol. I'm going to make the most out of this week, socially, religiously, and academically. I want to be active in my life and I want to make myself feel better and be a better person.

Cheers. I hope everyone is doing better than I am. :)