Oh, say say say.

I'm learning to treasure loneliness. Alone with my laptop while the rest of the working household sleeps as early as 11pm. And I lower the brightness of my screen and cuddle up with a blanket.

Musicmusicmusic. It is all affecting me all the time. I am inclined to listen to music that stirs my soul and gives me shivers. Makes memories. Maps by Yeahyeahyeahs. Laage Re Nain. Tere Ishq Main. Please Don't Leave Quite Yet.
It's International Cat Day and my kitty is sick. Aww.

Since Ramadan I have been completely and utterly overwhelmed each day thinking about all that is waiting for me in December. The wedding. The dresses and the dances and a birthday and my best friend being here from the States. Not to forget the ever present vivas and practicals of fourth year prof. My mind has been torn and panicked at what I'm supposed to do or how I'm supposed to juggle it all. One day I broke down just THINKING about it in its totality. Cried and cried and the tears wouldn't stop. And after that I simply placed my faith in Allah. He has got to help me through this. I refuse to worry anymore. I need to take each day and enjoy all that comes. Even if dance practices and hangouts with Mehreen means sleepless nights or barely breathing, I will do it. It's a worrying time coming up, but let me look at it in a more optimistic way: I'm going to see Mehreen after 7 years, and I'm going to be involved in so many activites (including prepping for exams) that I will never forget December 2014. A thousand plans are already lined up. Food Street in the chilly twilight atop Fort View. Al Hamra, Liberty, breakfasts, lunches. I'll be fine.
This swollen right neck lymph node is bothering the absolute crap out of me.
Proff exams in three weeks.
Dairy Milk Fruit and Nut every day is my survival, baby.